Note to Speidi

Of all couples that I find repulsive (Brad and Angelina, Lindsay and her girlfriend etc.) YOU are the absolute worst. I find you both to be attention- needy, annoying, whiny and stupid. Heidi- has it not occurred to your miniscule pea-brain that you have been alienated from all of your friends and family, and that you now have NO ONE besides this half-wit to hang out with? And PLEASE stop defending him, everyone hates him, your kind words about Spencer are wasted on me. Spencer- I think you are the biggest LOSER in the world and if I saw you in real life I wouldn't hesitate to go up to you and slap you right on your top ramen-for-beard- chin. Please both of you- GO AWAY and stop gracing the cover of US Weekly. It makes me NOT want to buy it.